Notes: This story is actually entitled: Painted Desert Series: Hopelessly, as it is story five of a series. Comments and constructive criticism are strongly encouraged. Don't worry, I'm not fragile...
The rest of the stories can be had via e-mail or at: http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Cavern/1841/pds.htm
Legal Stuff: The characters and situations used herein belong to Star Trek and the gang up on Mount Para...in other words, they are not mine... This pursuit is purely for my, and perhaps your enjoyment. Feel free to share with anyone you like as long as no profit is made and the story with disclaimers et al remain intact.
Hopelessly
by Jackee C.
Chakotay settled back in his chair as his office doors slid shut. He should have expected this, seen it coming. A small grin played about his lips as he considered the implications of the scene that had played itself out mere minutes before. How would *she* react? He found to his amazement that he didn't know...had no idea, even. Well, there was no time like the present to find out. No matter what her initial reaction, this would be good for them - for the crew, for her, and perhaps for them as well.
When she acknowledged his chime he realized that he was still smiling. Schooling his features, he entered to find her pouring over a report. Her eyes lingered on the document briefly before turning toward him.
"What can I help you with, Commander?" she asked, saving her place and setting the PADD on the desk.
Chakotay smiled slightly and seated himself. "Two crewmembers have made a request." He watched her carefully, awaiting the moment that realization would strike. Instead she frowned.
"What type of request?"
"A personal one." It was difficult to remain unaffected while her eyes wandered over his face, touching his barely hidden grin, noting the gentle mirth in his eyes. The moment arrived and her eyes widened. Confusion was suddenly replaced by mild distress.
"Who?" she asked, a bit sharper than he was sure she intended.
"Tom and B'Elanna," he answered, good humor faltering slightly. He'd hoped it would be happy news. His eyes dropped to his hands momentarily before they returned to hers. "They'd like you to officiate."
She turned and gazed blindly across the room. "When?" The frowned had returned, and Chakotay wondered just how bad this was going to be.
"In ten days. The anniversary of our entry in the Delta Quadrant." The humor was gone completely now, replaced by concern. "If you don't think it will..."
"No," she cut him off with a wave of her hand and forced a smile. "This is what this ship needs. We've all become a family. And frankly, I should be surprised it's taken this long." The smile that spread to her eyes was tinged with sadness. "This is probably going to be just the beginning. In spite of how happy I am for them, it raises some issues that need to be addressed."
"Agreed," Chakotay nodded. He'd noticed for some time the number of couples frequenting Sandrine's. Tom and B'Elanna's joining would be the impetus some of the others needed if they choose to take additional steps in their relationships. "I think it'll only be a matter of time before we have families on board."
"Yes." Kathryn rose and began to pace the small area near her desk. "And that's what terrifies me, Chakotay. This ship has limited capacity. I don't relish the idea of having to tell members of the crew that they'll have to limit their offspring. Children mean we'll need schools and child care. And some crew members may have traditional values concerning family duties. Voyager was never meant for families."
Chakotay paused, disturbed by her comments as well as her manner. "Whatever problems we face, we'll deal with. It's a normal progression for humanoids to bond and have children, regardless of where we happen to be stranded. That's the natural order of things and no amount of protocol can effectively alter that fact."
"I agree with you, Chakotay, that it will be difficult. But, if we are in this quadrant much longer it may come to that. And it's better to prepare the crew now. Having a ship full of children out here is very risky. We don't have Starfleet to back us up. I won't ask people not to have children, but limiting them isn't an unusual or unreasonable request. We have a limited number of escape pods, if it came to that. I wouldn't want to decide who could make it off ship and who would not."
Chakotay opened his mouth then closed it. This was a delicate subject with her, he knew. "Kathryn," he said gently. "I don't think it's a good idea to impose these restrictions."
"What would you propose we do?" she stared across at him. "Our supplies aren't limitless. You know how much of a strain it often is just to take care of the crew we have."
Chakotay's mind regestered her direct request for his suggestion with mild surprise. "Let them be a part of the solution," he said. "We have some fine engineering minds on this ship. So we don't currently have enough escape pods - let them put in their ideas, perhaps we can redesign them. Whatever the answer, we're all in this together. And no matter how careful we are life *is* risky, in the Alpha or in the Delta Quadrant. But they are choosing life, Kathryn. And given the choice, so would I. Every time. "
She blinked and smiled a crooked smile. "All right, Chakotay. All right." It was obvious that the situation was still bothering her, but she was willing to let the crew help her work out the issue. Turning toward the door she asked, "Shall we go break the news to the happy couple?"
Chakotay grinned and nodded.
The days that led up the first wedding on Voyager were filled with an undertone of excitement and expectation. Two similar requests were made within the first week of the announcement. Several crewmembers helped with the design of the ceremonial chamber and other preparation for the ceremonial meal. Neelix was absolutely beside himself with joy at acquiring the job of coordinator. The arguments between the bride and said coordinator became daily ritual. Eventually a combined human/Klingon ceremony was decided upon.
To say it went off without a hitch would be an exaggeration. But everyone survived it, and all had a wonderful time. Harry literally glowed as best man. And an obviously touched Chakotay gave the bride away. Kathryn Janeway presided over the ceremony with dignity under-laid with an almost maternal joy at seeing two of her beloved crew united. When the ceremony was complete the holodeck was transformed for the reception.
B'Elanna and Tom, hand in hand, opened the celebration by making a short speech. Chakotay's heart swelled as he watched the two of them together, so obviously in love. B'Elanna made a special thank you to him and Kathryn causing a hoot of applause from the happy gathering. While everyone else turned to watch the happy bride and groom move on to the floor for the first dance, Chakotay's eyes remained on Kathryn.
"I can't help but feel that they are our children and that they're leaving the nest," she said softly, conspicuous moisture glowing in her eyes. She held tightly when he reached a hand toward hers and squeezed.
"I know what you mean..." he began before they were interrupted. It was customary for the next dance to be led by the father of the bride and the mother of the groom.
"Come on, old man," B'Elanna chided as she led the commander to the center of the floor. Tom, obviously intelligent enough to not address the Captain in like manner, merely smiled and offered his bent arm.
Chakotay with B'Elanna and Kathryn with Tom led the next dance. It was a one of the few more sedate Klingon pieces, sang by Ensign Jason Astley from Cartography. Before the song ended Tom danced Kathryn toward B'Elanna and Chakotay and requested his new bride.
The lights dimmed as the music changed to one of old earth origin, also sang by Ensign Astley. It was much slower and more seductive than the Klingon melody had been. As the newlyweds melted in one anothers arms, Kathryn and Chakotay were left staring at each other.
"Shall we?" Chakotay asked, as other couples began moving onto the floor. His eyes dared her to say no. As she took his hand and stepped into his arms, he wondered how they'd managed to spend five years in the Delta Quadrant without ever dancing like this. And how was he ever going to recover?
The Ensign's baritone worked its magic, lulling both him and Kathryn into a delicious state. Bodies rocked smoothly, taken away by the hypnotic melody.
**Now the one who's always played it safe, becomes another who lost his way....**
As they continued to sway, his arms almost unconsciously drew her closer. He couldn't deny any of the words of the song. And was he mistaken or had she burrowed closer as well?
**I can't believe it, though I know it's true. I've hopelessly fallen in love with you... **
He had to know. The music and its power made him bold, more sure of his position. He pulled back slightly, knowing that she would do the same. And their eyes met.
**I'm not gonna fight it, I'm gonna choose to hopelessly fall in love with you... **
Hers were paradise itself, singing the words she'd never communicated. And for a brief moment as the strains of the song died away, he was sure she was admitting it to herself. Neither could say who made the first move, or if it was even conscious. But just as their lips would have touched, there was a loud outburst of applause. The spell was broken and they separated guiltily, both murmuring something about the wine.
Ensign Astley took his bows as the applause thundered on. B'Elanna and Tom clapped belatedly, half-heartedly cursing the Ensign for not having been able to draw the song out just a bit longer.
~End this section. Thanks for reading. Comments?
**However inaccurate, the italicized lyrics belong to Rick Astley's song entititled "Hopelessly"
This story is followed by: If I Call You Friend